Tall, short, curvy or not, no woman needs a scientific study to prove that the dating scene can be rough. As much as we strive to make good first impressions, donning our chicest tall women’s apparel on every first date to show off the best versions of ourselves, the art of romance can also bring out the worst of our insecurities.
We’re told women want “strong” men who can support and provide, while we’re told a man isn’t man enough unless he has a delicate, “feminine” woman by his side. Too often, that definition of feminine means non-threatening and small – in other words, the opposite of a tall babe.
If you can stomach more proof, the internet offers plenty of vibe-killing snippets of the psychology that drives these expectations. Exhibit A: Some men see short women as desirably feminine and “nurturing” but also more passive, while they may perceive taller women as more successful and even more intelligent, yet also intimidating. Sometimes it seems like no matter your size or shape, the world will find some reflection of your character in something as insignificant as your appearance. Awesome.
So is there any hope for tall ladies? The short answer is definitely. There is plenty of evidence, scientific or not, that attitudes about height in dating are shifting, and even that tall women paired with shorter men might be better off in relationships than their less vertically-gifted counterparts. Let’s dig into the details, shall we?
Scientific Silver Linings
A working paper covering data from 1986 to 2009 found some surprising trends about shorter men that might give us tall ladies reason to celebrate. When compared to men who were taller than their partners, shorter men did more household chores, were more likely to be the primary breadwinner, and were less likely to divorce.
Yep – you read that right. A shorter bae might actually be a better bae.
Obviously not all shorter men – or tall ladies – fit into a box (duh!), and there’s plenty of room for debate about the causes of these trends. Plus, we’d never want to throw shade on short ladies OR tall dudes, all of whom have the potential to be good partners.
But we’d be lying if we didn’t feel a little encouraged by the idea that shorter men might do a better job of “measuring up” when it comes to relationships. If you’re worried about including all those 5’10” and below dudes in your Tinder filter, just remember they might be willing to do much more than hold the door for you on your first date.
Your Height is Your Secret Weapon
Let’s be real – you stand out. You probably have for a long time, and no amount of slouching or on-trend flats will change that. You can (and should) play up your strengths with some killer ultra tall women’s clothing, but at the end of the day, you’re never fully free from those awed looks and cliched jokes aimed at your height.
But think about it this way: The men who find you too intimidating for a first date? The rejection might hurt at first, but in the end, it’s beyond good riddance. You don’t want to waste your precious time or energy getting all dressed up, downplaying your height, or jumping through hoops to impress someone who’s hung up on something as shallow as a number on the tape measure.
On the other hand, men who stick around are more likely to love you for you. And if they’re interested in you in all your tall, gorgeous glory, they’re probably more secure in their own height and masculinity.
Tips for Feeling Fierce and Fly in the Dating Game
- Dress however makes you feel beautiful. Tall women’s apparel designed with your proportions in mind will help you flaunt your best features, so don’t be afraid to fill your closet with date-ready ultra tall women’s apparel. But at the end of the day, there are a million ways for you to express your personal style. If you’re feeling confident in your first-date fit, your beauty will shine through.
- Be open-minded. By scaling down your dating pool to only include guys taller than you, you might be missing out on a super compatible match – and get stuck on dud dates with guys whose height makes the cut, but with whom the sparks just aren’t flying. Remember, science has your back on this one!
- Know your passions and seek out someone who shares them. There are much better things to obsess over with your new boo than your height or his, and it will be ten times easier if you both share a passion for food, travel, exercise, music – whatever gets you excited.
So, are men intimidated by tall women? If they are, we say forget it. Tall or short, the ones who don’t feel threatened are waiting in the wings to help you celebrate your tall, beautiful, confident self… and maybe help dry the dishes, too.
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